WALKING INTO IT

(c) Wendy Turner

It started out as a pleasant afternoon stroll. Caroline was looking forward to a whole afternoon with David, their first bit of time alone. They had met some months ago at Sylph-vestors, the local slimming club. Caroline had weighed in at seventeen stones and David at eighteen stones four pounds. For four months they had counted calories, studied fat units, absorbed riveting information about proteins and carbohydrates, all the time eyeing each other across a crowded, bulky room.

The cliff-top walk was beautiful with weak sunlight flashing between misty patches of light. A fresh breeze accompanied them and gulls shrieked far overhead. After an hour or so, a rest was in order. David creaked to a halt, helpfully held Caroline's hand while she settled herself, and lowered his bulk onto the flattish surface of a nearby rock. Gratefully, he slipped off his rucksack and swung it onto the grass.

"What a lovely place to stop," said Caroline, removing her sunglasses. "Look at that gorgeous view, beach for miles."

"I am looking at the gorgeous view," David smiled, making her blush. "And the beach is lovely too. But I must admit, I'm famished. What did we pack in the end?"

The packed lunch had been a bit of a tussle. They hadn't wanted to squander too many points so had agreed to keep it simple. Caroline had made lettuce and cucumber sandwiches with low-cal Nimble and a flask of Good For You Cuppa Minestrone Soup. David had undertaken to provide desert, which consisted of one Weight Watchers fairy cake each, two apples and a banana to share. That would allow them grilled cod and broccoli later. The sandwiches and soup disappeared like magic and they lingered over the fruit, cutting it up into tiny pieces to make it last longer.

"Delicious," David murmured, thinking that it hadn't even touched the sides. What he'd give for a pint and a steak pie.

"Wasn't it nice. I'm glad you enjoyed it," said Caroline, with visions of the thick-cut toasted sandwiches she used to have, dripping with melted cheese and mayonnaise.

They packed the picnic things away and staggered to their feet. "Nice cup of tea when we get back," David said. Caroline smiled in return, thinking that she could demolish a church bazaar pot all by herself. She pulled her cardigan from her bag and threw it around her shoulders. The mist had come down a bit and she shivered as a band of cold air hit them.

"Not cold then, are you?" David risked putting an arm around her.

"Oh no, not really," she said. "Well, perhaps just a little bit."

They continued around the coast in pleasant, quiet friendship, admiring the lacy sea and the blue haze. It did cross David's mind that he hadn't a clue where they were, but it was such a delightful afternoon he really wasn't worried. They could always go back the way they'd come.

After two hours, the fog rolled in. The sun and sea disappeared and the birds' chatter, out of sight, sounded ghostly. Caroline was uncomfortably aware that they were walking near the cliff edge, which was also rapidly fading from view.

"Do you think we're going the right way?" she asked, hiding a twinge of anxiety.

"I think so love. We've probably come round in a huge circle. Let's turn left away from the cliff." But what if it's the wrong way? said a little voice in his head. You could both lose your footing over the edge. He shuddered. It didn't bear thinking about. But what if they couldn't find the way back? Could they last all night up here? Exciting as it would be to cuddle up, they might die from hypothermia.

After another hour of wandering, David called a halt.

"We'll have to stop for a minute, love," he said. "I'm done in. Have we got any soup left?" It felt like a week since he'd eaten.

Caroline was only too glad to stop. They'd pulled on their waterproofs but her hair was soaking and she wore only sandals. Between them they produced a few drops of minestrone soup, a nimble crust and a packet of peppermints that David had on him. They shared them in abject misery.

"Don't worry too much, love," David said. "This is England, you know, not the Scottish Highlands. We're bound to find something if we keep going."

"But it's getting dark, and my feet are freezing. We might wander around all night."

"Come on." He pulled her up. "Let's get cracking. The sooner we start, the sooner we'll be home." She smiled a weak smile. Not that he could see it in the murk.

They trudged on for a while until they spotted a far-off light. "Looks like a farmhouse. We're in luck love," David said, hoping so with all his heart. He knocked anxiously at the door. It was opened by a large woman in a clean apron, who listened to their tale of woe sympathetically. "Come on in," she said. "You must be tired out."

She said her name was Mabel and led them into a warm kitchen with a roaring fire. Huge hams hung on hooks from the ceiling and trays of eggs were stacked up on the floor. The wonderful aroma of baking bread and hot coffee wafted around. They collapsed at the huge refectory table, Caroline holding out her squelchy feet to the fire. "You've save my life," she murmured. "You're so kind," said David, overwhelmed with relief.

"Now you two just warm yourselves up while I get you a nice meal," Mabel said, bustling about. David squeezed Caroline's hand. "Told you it'd be OK," he said.

Mabel returned with two massive trenchers. On each were four huge slices of thick-cut ham with a breaded crust, a hand of sizzling outsized sausages dripping with gravy and mustard, half a cold chicken and a mountain of fried potatoes. She produced a whole cottage loaf, which she whacked into wedges with a cleaver, and a tub of home-churned butter. "Eat up, my dears", she said, pouring out two massive glasses of home brewed beer. "I'll leave you to it."

They stared at the enormous plates of food, and then at each other. Their faces lit up like children at Christmas. David raised his glass.

"To you, my partner in adventure. May it be the first of many."

"Well, perhaps not too many quite like this," she said. "But yes, to a long and happy partnership."

The meal vanished within five minutes. Caroline would never have imagined that she could have seen that lot off. David sat back happier than at any time during the last four months. Mabel reappeared with a lace-covered tray, a coffee pot, brown sugar and a one-pint jug of cream.

"That was just great," they both breathed, with huge sighs of contentment. "What a wonderful meal and not a carrot in sight."

"Oh yes there is," Mabel said. "You must try this carrot cake." Caroline and David nodded happily in agreement. "And I'll pour," she continued. "Anyone for sugar?"

"No, not for us, thanks, my dear. " David replied. "We're dieting."